I just turned 25 here are 5 things I wish I knew at 20

Leaving my early 20's and stepping into my mid-20's! Now that my frontal lobe is fully developed (lol), here's what I wish I'd known sooner.

1. Being alone doesn't have to mean you are lonely

   I thought that if I didn't have someone to share life with, I would be lonely. But I learned that being alone also means I can enjoy the moment I'm in and get to know myself better. We're never stagnant —we're always changing so alone time is valuable. Moving to London was sometimes lonely and scary, but it showed me that I could become my own friend and discover just how capable I really am.

2. It's not that deep

   This is sooo helpful for me as a planner and overthinker just to remind myself at the end of the day, it's not that deep. The job you lose, the canceled plans, the crush who doesn't like you back, a bad grade...it's not that deep. The world keeps spinning whether you want it to or not, so obsessing over things you can’t control only ends up hurting you.

3. You deserve someone who wants you

   This one just comes from growing up and dating in my 20s: you deserve someone who wants you in all seasons of life. There will never be a time where it's all rainbows and butterflies. Sometimes you'll give 90% while your partner can only give 10% and vice versa. The important part is waking up and choosing each other anyways.

4. You are in control of your environment and the people around you

   There’s a big push on social media of people sharing only the glamorous parts of their day to day life and not always the reality. For me, that meant noticing where I felt unhappy in my own life and then comparing it to others, which only left me frustrated. I am someone who wants to skip the baby steps and jump straight into a perfected routine where I love everything I do every day. That's not realistic but if I am not happy with what I am doing now, I can make small changes. I can try a new hobby, pick a place to travel to, join a friend networking event. Little choices can open up so many new and exciting possibilities—I just have to give them a shot.

5. I am so lucky to care so much

   I try to remind myself that caring so deeply is a gift—even when it hurts. At the end of the day, when I step back from the emotions, I can see how much love I have for the people and things in my life, and I feel a real sense of gratitude. When my mom used to drop me off at school, she always said, “I love you, and be kind.” I didn’t always live up to that, but over time I’ve learned that I am a good friend, daughter, partner, and student—and that I approach everything in life with love and passion. That’s something special I don’t always give myself credit for.

As I head into my mid-20's I hope that I will continue to grow into these habits and find new ones! Feel free to share any wisdom or thoughts in the comments

-W